What Are the Signs That You and Your Spouse Need Counseling?

    Like marriage, couple’s therapy is work. You don’t know what you need until you experience it, which means that marriage counseling and therapy is not for everyone. However, when positive signs are ignored by one or both partners, couples can drift apart and suffer in silence.

    When your marriage needs help the first sign to look for is anger. Marital stress often shows up as anger, which can be healthy or destructive. Healthy anger is constructive and allows partners to voice complaints in a productive way. Destructive anger builds over time and manifests in less constructive ways such as withdrawal, passive aggression or even physical violence. The marriage counseling and therapy signs of anger include:

    • Arguably invented by marriage counselors, the silent treatment is the ultimate marriage problem sign. It’s designed to punish your partner but it can be used for any marriage conflict. The silent treatment sends the marriage message that you don’t care about resolving issues. Marriage counseling and therapy may be needed by both parties.
    • Another marriage counseling and therapy sign is that one or both partners try to change the marriage through shirking responsibilities. This happens when one spouse stops doing things that are a part of the marriage agreement by trying to get out of chores, sex and other marriage duties.
    • Ignoring marriage problems is another marriage problem sign. Silence forces your marriage problems underground where resentment festers into anger at some point.
    • During arguments marriage counseling and therapy signs include yelling, cursing, name-calling and other verbal violence. These marriage problem signs are designed to punish your spouse but they have the opposite effect because it’s difficult to resolve marriage issues after an argument.
    • A marriage problem sign is one or both partners not speaking for hours or days at a time. This marriage counseling and therapy sign is designed to punish the marriage by ignoring marriage issues until they become so big that an argument is needed to resolve them.
    • When marriage problems are pushed underground, your marriage may show signs of hiding. This could be in the form of compulsive working or internet browsing where one spouse hides from their marriage problems.

    Although marriage counseling and therapy isn’t for everyone, it may include several problems that can be resolved with marriage help. For example, if your marriage is in need of marriage advice, it’s caused by conflict avoidance in your marriage. Healthy relationships require an environment where couples can seek support in working through marriage obstacles.

    Some marriage problem signs show up when you avoid discussing marriage issues with your marriage partner. Conflict avoidance is a marriage problem sign that can be resolved with marriage help, but first it must be identified as a marriage issue.

    You or your spouse may need marriage counseling and therapy if you continually avoid marriage problems. Otherwise, signs of conflict avoidance will continue and your marriage may suffer.